Write the menu for the world’s worst fast food restaurant. Please pull up to the window for your total.
732
Write a list of things you want to do before you die or kill someone.
300
Write an acrostic poem where each first letter in every line ends up spelling “Stunning Handful”.
929
Write a parody song.
890
Write a new ending to The Social Network where everybody wins.
846
Write about what would have happened had Jack never traded his cow for magic beans.
743
Write detailed directions for best using a didgeridoo in self-defense.
508
Write an outline that story you’ve been putting off starting for a while. What a wacky prompt!
435
Write a treatise or treatsy concerning the differences between a treatise or treatsy.
808
Write a short story about password safety told entirely through passwords ranging between 6-22 characters (including special characters and punctuation).
161
Write one more “away message” for AOL Instant Messenger and then come downstairs for dinner, Katie. I will not ask you again.
1009
Write dialogue between two lovers on a sinking boat. They should not be lovers by the time the boat is completely submerged.
304
Write some words.
296
Write a stand-up comedy routine that is funny, wholly inoffensive, and funny.
36
Write a news article about a babysitter who is eaten by the children.
370
Write about your personal experience dating a superhero who’s only super power is breaking up.
369
Write a reminder for something you keep forgetting.
136
Write your theory for extraterrestrials as a report for your government job. Also, you’re an alien.
326
Write a series of text messages between you and a celebrity who shares your birthday. The text messages can be solicited or otherwise.
455
Write a sermon for a religion that aims to make brunch a crime punishable by death. I’m giving you a lot to work with, today.
781
Write a story by rearranging all of the letters in a can of alphabet soup.
981
Write an assessment of your parents’ child-raising skills. Include your older brother, Tony, whom you’ve never met. Include a letter grade. Do it for Tony.
110
Write a post-apocalyptic thriller that takes place before you were born, doesn’t include time travel, and has a projected runtime of 93 minutes. Oh, and a projected budget of 93 dollars. Can’t forget the 93 dollars.
36
Write about a Klondike bar with a conscience – and what it would do for you.
309
Write about yourself. But keep it short and ask about me.
605
Write a significant portion of your income off as tax deductible. Or don’t.
365
Write new names for each month of the year. Try new names for the days of the week – or your significant other – too!
792
Write about a suprise party where the suprise is everybody got the wrong date for the party.
82
Write a note to place on somebody’s car that you hit – with your fists. Remember to mention insurance.
214
Write a personal ad. If your significant other finds it, tell them it was just a one time thing. It’s just a prompt, that’s all. Just a prompt.
71
Write a follow-up to any news article you can find but you have to include the phrase “smart as a fart”. Even if somebody died. Especially, in fact.
750
Write a ghost story where the ghosts are afraid of the human s.
599
Write an acceptance speech for an award you should have won but didn’t. You may already have this crumpled in a drawer, somewhere.
807
Write a character who is evil and has zero redeeming factors and wouldn’t even look good on a t-shirt.
109
Write a story where the first sentence is the same as the last sentence but the events of the story have dramatically changed the context.
1008
Write a love letter to your favorite alphabetical letter.
462
Write an out-of-office email. If you don’t work in an office, this is why you need one.
97
Write a prescription for whatever your friggin problem is, okay?
921
Write a short scene about two people breaking up with each other at the same time but for different things. On an airplane. Do it on an airplane.
1015
Write a chapter out of your favorite book from memory.
523
Write a message that will self destruct for a spy who will self destruct.
91
Write a grocery list for your favorite serial killer even if they ate people. Especially, even.
299
Write a prophecy that includes two of the following inanimate objects: Nickels, Florida, and my girlfriend. Remember, these objects are inanimate.
699
Write a sign that somebody will actually read.
700
Write a response to any video on Youtube and keep it to yourself like everybody else should.
645
Write a commercial for women’s granola bars, which are bars that only serve granola to women.
20
Write insipirational quotes for your blog as a Self-Made Genie Boss trapped in a magic lamp.
618
Write a writer’s prompt not involving food or somebody’s job.
990
Write new rules for The Game of Life that focus more on wandering the game board in your early 30’s filled with regret and a great credit score.
171
Write your final notice for working Disney’s Jungle Cruise. The notice will be delivered mid-tour.
141
Write a text message to your ex. You can choose to write this prompt less sober, later. Do not send the text message.
805
Write a choose-your-own-adventure story but don’t call it a choose-your-own-adventure story because you’ll get sued.
801
Write the penultimate chapter of your autobiography. Be sure to include the word “zoo” at least four time even if you don’t plan on visiting the zoo the second to last chapter of your life.
615
Write a data log of an alien who should have worn sunscreen when visiting Earth, but didn’t.
377
Write a ransom note but don’t kidnap anybody and make sure nobody ever sees the note. Actually, on second thought, don’t write a ransom note. Go outside. Drink some water. Keep your hands to yourself.
194
Write a post apocalyptic story about the last person on Earth who realizes somebody or something out there is still making episodes of The Simpsons.
105
Write a recipe for a dish that has all the ingredients of stromboli but definitely isn’t stromboli.
249
Write an article about the ongoing legal dispute between Five Guys and the June-only pop-up burger joint Five Gays.
246
Write a magazine profile for the hottest new celebutante in the ding dong ditching scene, Kim Doordashian.
528
Write a warning for anybody about to break your heart or into your house. It’s usually somebody you know, too. That’s my warning for you.
749
Write a children’s story about the naughty and single Miss Behave and her sister-in-law, the married and proper Mrs. Behave.
746
Write new lyrics to “American Pie”. Also, make it shorter. Please, make it shorter.
741
Write the continuing adventures of DJ Tiesto and his pet manatee, DJ Manatiesto.
389
Write a list of things your dog has done wrong. Or skip writing today, since dogs can’t do anything wrong.
933
Write a scene where the pig and the sheep first meet in the new barnyard rom-com “10 Things I Hate About Ewe”.
1022
Write a warning for an employee whom you’re sure is eating all of the office supplies, but the only evidence is on their hips.
649
Write something your parents would enjoy. Ha!
828
Write a series of increasingly outlandish hand soap names for a business that rhymes with “Ath & Body Works”.
717
Write 10 new Commandments. You are God now.
119
Write instructions for mending a broken heart. Count how many times you used the word “chocolate”.
512
Write a series of passive aggressive sticky notes and place them around your home. If you don’t have a home you can skip writing today.
925
Write directions for cooking your favorite meal but replace all of the ingredients with office supplies.
60
Write a story told entirely through fortune cookies.
830
Write a definition for a word in the dictionary that you don’t know. If you can’t find a word you don’t understand, you’re a know-it-all and I hate you.
351
Write the foreword for a book about farts, titled “Sorry’s Not Enough”.
795
Write out a list of work references and ask yourself why you aren’t surrounded by successful people like that all the time, Bill.
127
Write the closed captioning for an episode of television. Leave the volume muted during transcription.
566
Write a missed connection for somebody who cut you off on the freeway. It’s… it’s complicated.
1011
Write an obituary for a person who jumped in a pile of latkes.
237
Write a horoscope. Use a thesaurus to replace all the words you have written. Do this for ten more horoscopes and you’re good for monetization.
332
Write a detention slip for a kid you suspect isn’t a kid, but is actually a 40 year old man. You can’t prove it but you’re right about this one.
675
Write a math problem involving babies and stolen candy or candy and stolen babies.
855
Write a short story about Thursdays being illegal. And you’re guilty.
427
Write an article about the ongoing legal litigation between Starbucks and the first coffee shop in outer space – also named Starbucks.
479
Write an autopsy report in which the discovery of a third major American political party is made in the deceased’s colon.
984
Write a new book of the Bible where Jesus Christ comes back to the DMV and dies for everybody’s renewal fees .
1029
Write a speech for Abraham Lincoln if he survived his assassination attempt and John Wilkes Booth didn’t.
940
Write a birthday card for somebody who you hope doesn’t invite you to anymore birthdays.
363
Write a testimonial for a product called “Turkey Milk”. Keep in mind, there’s more money in it for you if you don’t mention the taste or texture. Or color.
758
Write a letter to an institutional learning facility that was recently renamed after you. Urge them to reconsider that decision.
286
Write an eviction notice for a tenant who never missed a rent payment, never paid late, and never did anything wrong, ever.
625
Write an apology. You know why, Carol.
306
Write a list of rules for anybody coming over and using your pool. If you don’t have a pool then there are no rules.
899
Write your very own theme song. Consider whether you’re a comedy, a drama, or soon-to-be canceled on Netflix.
533
Write a review for a coffee shop that wrote “Todd” on your cup but your name isn’t Todd. It doesn’t even rhyme with Todd.
And if your name is Todd? You got decaf.
160
Write a short story about the world’s longest story.
403
Write warning information for something not dangerous, like carrots or friendships.
90
Write a letter to your dog. If you don’t have a dog, write a letter to somebody else’s dog, but don’t mail it. Not again.
152
Write a new ending for a book that needed a better one. Fix the beginning, too.
209
Write a police report for an unspeakable crime committed on a pogo stick.